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A few pointers on massage parlors.
(thanks to Mr. Buwayahman)
1. Enter the massage parlor. Don’t be shy. Walk as if you’ve been there a number of times.
2. Go to the counter. Check out the prices.
3. Ask to see the showroom. You will be escorted to an area where you can view the massage parlor attendants (MPA).
4. Make your selection.
5. Go back to the counter to select the room. Pay. You will be given a key. You will then be escorted to the room
6. When you are in the room, you will be asked if you want some refreshments. It’s totally up to you. Just remember that you will have to pay for what you order.
7. Secure your belongings. The key that was handed to you in step #5 is used to lock a drawer or a cabinet. I lock away my watch, wallet, and company ID.
8. Proceed to undress. It’s your choice whether or not you want to wait for the attendant to arrive or go ahead and take a shower. A number of attendants will accompany you inside the shower.
9. Shower and do whatever it takes to be clean. If the amenities are present, I brush my teeth, gargle some mouthwash, and shave. Towel dry yourself, wrap the towel around your waist, and lie down
10. At this point, the massage will begin. You can also ask to forego the massage and go straight to the “extra service. ” If you opt for the massage, the MPA will ask whether it’s powder, oil, or lotion.
11. When all is said and done, shower once more.
12. Dress up. Gather all your belongings.
13. Don’t forget to pay the tip. The ES tip is typically the same as the room rate. Thus, if you paid for a P1500 room, the ES tip should P1500.
14. Optional: It is ok to ask for the MPAs mobile number. Some even offer to give it.
15. Leave.
Some reminders on the massage:
■Don’t expect professional-level massage.
■You can engage in small talk. Or you can even remain silent and sleep. Either one will not affect the fact that you will get some ES in the end.
On the “extra service:”
■It is expected that the MPA will do all the work, which is typically the customary licking of nipples, kissing of body, rubbing of her breasts on your chest. She will then kiss her way downwards wherein you should get the fellatio.
■The fellatio is actually a way for the MPA to slide in a condom without you noticing. The most common technique is for the MPA to put the condom in her mouth. Many MPAs do this even before beginning the nipple-licking part.
■After the BJ, the sex is next. Typically, the MPA starts off on top but then you can gain control and perform a variety of positions. How you want to end is all up to you. Do you want to end dog-style? Or missionary? Side-to-side? No problem.
■Most MPAs don’t like heavy kissing or bare-back blowjobs (i.e., a BJ with no condom). If you get one who is willing to kiss or give BBBJs, you may consider yourself lucky but bear in mind that if she agrees to do it with you, then she has also been willing to do it when any of her other guests. Including the one before you. And he could have been some unkempt Pigpen with rotting teeth and bad hygiene.
■Most MPAs live by the tips. So try not to be stingy.
