Guys,
Lets take it easy on Einzigerfan. He just got his first guitar and we went "read this whole sticky"... It's up to 70+ pages already. I don't think he has the time to read all. Better here to ask than make a separate thread.
Einzigerfan, lets follow digitalcyco's advise and we will try to explain in our own layman's terms about several effects.
Distortion - this makes the guitar sound heavy or crunchy. When you hear rock and roll or the "heavy guitar" it comes from the distortion effect. This pedal is a staple and a "must".
Flanger - simply put, it is what you use to sound like the new wave 80's
Phaser - gives a pulsating character to the guitar tone. Sounds futuristic.
Delay - repeats your note in varying degrees such as time and pulse.
Chorus - it will sound like you have two guitars.
The tone from the combination of these pedals are endless and has been the source of many heated debates here.
Unless you have a bottomless wallet, go easy on buying stuff. Know what type of music you like to "play". When you know what you want, come back here and keep asking us to help you. Some of us will tell to buy this pedal or that pedal. None are wrong but not all are correct.
There are many skilled and helpful people here. If you have a specific question, use the search function, maybe there is a thread about it already.
Good luck and have fun with your new toy.